Write on Wednesday

"Did you hear how I phrased it?" he said, looking at me.
"Yeah." I answered, meeting his gaze for a second, but then flicking away. This was always happening to me, people correcting me on everything I said. I used to think, "Why do you ridicule me for my mistakes, but when I point out yours, you scream at me?". Now, I just accept everything calmly, knowing that it will probably go on for the rest of my life. I can never escape it, never get away from it. It's just going to always be a part of my life, and I just need to accept that. But the thing is, I don't want to. I need to, but I don't want to.

Anything I try to do, I get ridiculed. Nothing will help. Absolutely nothing. I am all alone on a cliff, standing at the edge, with people laughing and pushing me closer to the edge, to the sheer drop. I try to push back, but they're too strong. I have nothing to save me, except to end it on my own terms and just jump before they can push me. I hope that at the last minute, they will change their minds and stop pushing. But I know that's not likely. Actually, it's never going to happen. No matter how many times they promise to stop, it always starts again. I just have to accept my fate and jump.

IamtheGreekGeek: The stories a tree could tell....

IamtheGreekGeek: The stories a tree could tell....: A tree could tell a lot of stories. It could tell of all the storms it's weathered, or of how it's surroundings have changed throughout the ...

The stories a tree could tell....

A tree could tell a lot of stories. It could tell of all the storms it's weathered, or of how it's surroundings have changed throughout the centuries it's been alive. I feel that a tree would have a very strong, deep, confident, calm, patient voice, don't you think? It would develop all those qualities throughout its life, patience coming last of all, because, or course, that is the most difficult quality to obtain. If a tree could tell stories, I would gladly sit there and listen, for the rest of my life, to all the stories a tree would tell. The people who would get impatient and stomp away would not be able to appreciate the tree's wisdom, and therefore, not hear its lessons. I think we should all listen to trees, they could teach us a lot about our selves, others, and the world.

My life

This is how I'm viewing my life right now. I wrote a little poem about it, I don't think it's very good, its kind of depressing.

My Life

Spiraling down into the deep dark hole called my life

With only brief flashes of light to sustain me

In this deep dark hole called my life

I never know if I'll ever get out alive

The nightmares chase me

Torturing me with my life

I relive the memories

Crying at the stranger called my life

I'm spiraling down into the deep dark hole called my life

I never know if I'll ever get out alive

In this deep dark hole called my life

No one's here to see me when I die

I used to laugh at all the small things

Now I laugh at nothing

I used to run and enjoy my life

Now I wait for it all to end

Nothing can save me

Not the moon, not the sun

Nor love, the eternal kind

I'm trapped here, in my mind

I'm questioning everything I knew

  Is this is all truely happening to me?

Could this all be a dream, a fantasy?

I wake up, throwing myself into my life

Blinking at all the light that sustains me

Was that thing I knew my life?

I guess it was, don't know what else to say

I'm not spiraling down into the deep dark hole called my life

Instead, I'm basking in the light of my new life

I throw myself into everything I do

Trying not to allow the thing I saw to come true

Autumn Poem

I composed a poem about autumn when I was walking home from school, in about 5 min. Of course, I revised and edited it, later on, but still... I think that that is a pretty big accomplishment for me, since I usually don't write poetry, and if I do, it is usually written in hours, not minutes. I think that this is pretty good, at least for me, so let me know what you think! Well, here goes nothing! Wish me (or my poem) luck!

Autumn

When the leaves change colors

The wind begins to blow

The apples ripen

For frosty snow

When the birds begin to nest

The flowers start to die

When the weather turns cold

In the brisk autumn sky

The leaves begin to fall

And dew becomes frost

When rain turns to snow

Summer is lost

When water becomes ice

The wind turns cold

The fires are lit

And stories are told

When the grass starts to sprout

The sun begins to shine

Flowers start to bloom

And love blossoms fine

The weather turns hot

The sun fails to set

Cold is wanted

And people start to fret

When the leaves change colors

Everybody knows

Autumn is coming

And the world seems aglow

Stage Crew!!!

At my school, we are doing the musical version of The Whiz. The Whiz is a spin off of The Wizard of Oz, and I have yet to see it. I absolutely adore stage crew, and everything about it, and so, when I heard that we were going to be doing a play, I immediately volunteered for stage crew! I am, I think, the only older kid to want to be only in stage crew, and not in the actual play. I have previous experience in stage crew, so I was hoping that the directors would choose me to be head of stage crew. They did!!!! I am so happy!!!! I am now officially head of stage crew!!!! Even though I know that this will be a lot, I am going to give my all and make this an awesome musical/play!!!! In my last post, I talked about stress, and the many things that were stressing me out, but then my dad gave me a pep talk, and now I am a lot less stressed! I know that this might (aka will) add more stress to my life, but I really don't care! I will deal with it as it comes!

Stress

I am under so much stress! I have major tests soon, that will affect my academic career, I am starting to feel the social pressure, my friends are kind of acting weird, etc. Some people say that stress is good for you in small doses, but this is not small! My only escape is reading or talking or something else of that same sort that takes my mind off of it! I cannot escape it!!!!! I have just recently become not afraid of my mother, which is slightly a good thing, but it just adds more stress and pressure to my life, because she keeps on getting mad at me and when I would usually have a wave of fear, I now feel nothing. I have no fear, no anxiety, no nothing when she is mad at me. It is shocking! I am going to be so glad when we get into Christmas break, 'cause then all the stress will probably be gone!